sharing your goals is cheap dopamine

why you should stop announcing your goals to the world

have you ever felt that surge of motivation and confidence after sharing goals with someone? for instance, telling someone you’re going to try 75-hard or you’re going to start a YouTube channel? do you remember the momentum you feel after sharing? yes, of course sharing your goals with someone can inspire you to take action, increase your confidence, and create a sense of accountability. however, no one talks about the fact that announcing your goals can feel just as good as actually accomplishing them.

sharing goals can create a psychological reward similar to achieving them, reducing the motivation to follow through. this phenomenon known as premature satisfaction (a study by NYU psychologist Peter Gollwitzer) occurs because the act of sharing tricks the brain into feeling a sense of accomplishment.

not only does voicing your goals out loud to someone trigger this sense of achievement, but when someone acknowledges or praises your goals, your brain also interprets this social recognition as a reward. this combination can diminish your internal drive to pursue the goal, since part of the satisfaction associated with achieving it has already been experienced.

i think in today’s social media driven world, we forget that the real work is offline when nobody is watching and giving us the constant boost of motivation through views, likes and comments. it’s like the second we are lonely with our own thoughts trying to work towards a goal, our discipline goes out the door and we give up. motivation is a fleeting emotion, it is not constant - which is why we get this huge surge of energy when we announce goals and not actually do the work to achieve them. at the end of the day, your goals and ideas don’t matter without execution.

that’s not to say that having and sharing goals isn’t admirable and inspiring. the point is, be aware of the cheap dopamine hit when declaring them.

i became aware of how amazing i felt when i shared goals to people irl or online, and i realized that this feeling felt just as good as accomplishing them. i noticed the journey of working towards the goal felt discouraging because the motivation wore off and i ultimately would give up. i wanted to see results quicker and achieve my goals faster because social media makes hard things look easy.

this is ultimately why i delayed sharing that i am currently training for a marathon coming up at the end of this month. i was about 6 weeks into my marathon training when i decided to share my goal of running a marathon on my YouTube channel. i decided to share it with my YouTube community first because that community is closer and knows me better through long-form content. i then decided to share my ‘week of workouts: marathon training’ on my TikTok and Instagram when i was about 9 weeks into training as a way of documenting my journey for short-form consumers. delaying the announcement of my marathon goal to the internet has been crucial in this journey because it taught me the following:

• don’t rely on external validation to keep you motivated - showing up for yourself when no one is watching or cheering you on is the hottest thing you can do for yourself. you’re training yourself to stop relying on others to keep you inspired and you’re avoiding the dopamine hit of social recognition - ultimately building your discipline.

• lack of discipline makes you ugly - talking yourself out of things and opting for a sweet treat or face mask is not self-care, it’s self-sabotage.

• talk is cheap - sharing becomes a substitute for doing, as it provides temporary validation without requiring tangible progress.

my marathon training is 16 weeks long and i knew that this was going to be one of the hardest things i’ll ever do in my life, which is why i decided to delay announcing my goal publicly. i didn’t want the dopamine hit before i even started training - i wanted to work through the first 6 weeks silently with my core people irl. since announcing that i am training for the marathon however, i am so overwhelmed with gratitude for people that have been supporting me online. it’s created a space where i can document my journey and hopefully inspire people to work towards their goals even when motivation flees us.

i wanted to document the process, not the announcement. i wanted to replace the “i’m going to” with “i’m working towards” or “i did that”. i’ve noticed that the theme for march was just doing rather than talking, and i intend to continue approaching my goals with that same mindset.

this isn’t to say that i don’t share my goals altogether - i’m just selective. for instance, i keep my bigger goals to myself such as finances and specific health goals, but i love sharing other goals like: read 3 books this month, no phone 30 minutes before bed & gua sha every morning.

i also think that the psychological impact of sharing goals depends heavily on who you share them with and why. balancing the benefits of accountability with the risks of premature satisfaction is essential for effective goal achievement, especially in today’s world where we often times only see the results and not the journey.

i challenge you to keep your biggest and most daunting goals to yourself. protect and pour into that goal by yourself (or with people that will help you get there like a coach, partner, etc). i challenge you to fall in love with the process - not the announcement, the social recognition, the views, the likes, or the results.

thank you for taking the time to read today’s newsletter! and thank you for 4,000 subscribers! i literally don’t even know how we got here but i appreciate every single one of you for being here 💌