your fear of looking stupid is holding you back

what do you mean you’re scared of what the people you went to high school with will think of you?

i fear you don’t have a bestie who will just tear the band-aid off and be brutally honest with you so i’ll do the honors… no one cares about you as much as you think.

please don’t take that the wrong way, but it’s the truth. girl, we literally are on a spinning rock in the universe and you care about what your high school ‘it girl’ thinks about you???

if you saw someone trying something new for the first time or doing something they love, would you judge them? would you be mean to them? or would you admire them and their confidence? if i saw a girl vlogging down the streets of portland in her cute little outfit talking to a camera, i genuinely would be in awe and it would inspire me to stop being afraid of being perceived. doing things without the fear of judgement from others is the sexiest trait you can have.

i’m writing this to serve as a reminder that no one is you, and that is your superpower. the way people perceive you is not your responsibility - there’s nothing you can do about someone’s perception of you. trying something new is hard… we often think to ourselves:

• ‘what will they say’

• ‘i don’t want to look stupid’

• ‘this is cringey’

i had these exact same fears and inner dialogue, so i didn’t tell anyone - i just did it. i created the youtube channel and started acting like a content creator until i grew the confidence to become one.

here’s a few things i like to remind myself when i get in my head about fearing perception:

1. stop letting people control your life - you’re hotter than that!

one thing i’ve learned from posting bits of my life online is that when you let these fears stop you from doing what you want like posting a youtube video, posting a tiktok, trying a new workout class, etc., you’re literally letting other people control your life. this thought alone keeps me from being too scared to post online and do what i want.

2. ‘your playing small does not serve the world’.

here’s my favorite quote of all time (if you can tell me the name of the movie this comes from, then i think we’re soulmates):

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate,
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.

It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us.
Your playing small does not serve the world.

There is nothing enlightened about shrinking
so that other people won’t feel insecure around you.

We were all meant to shine as children do.
It’s not just in some of us, it’s in everyone.

And, as we let our own light shine, we consciously give
other people permission to do the same.

As we are liberated from our fear,
our presence automatically liberates others.”

‘your playing small does not serve the world’ - if I let every person’s hate comment and judgement affect me, i would still be working my accounting job and hating my life. if i didn’t believe in myself to be shameless in brand outreach, i wouldn’t have landed deals that pay my rent with just 1 silly little TikTok. if i didn’t stop playing small and pitch to hotels, i wouldn’t have landed collaborations to travel to my favorite places for free. what one person will find cringe, another will find inspiring.

you are the only person standing in your way from immense growth and opportunity because you’re too scared of being perceived.

3. negativity has nothing to do with you.

you will absolutely get hate from someone if you post your life online - it’s inevitable. people project what they are dealing with in their life onto others. they may be in a really bad place or going through some tough life struggles which is typically why people take the time out of their day to send hate towards others online. people will project to make themselves feel better and that has literally nothing to do with you.

this is your sign to do the things that scare you. pitch yourself to your dream brands, film in public because it’s really not that serious and take up space! the biggest lie i’ve heard in the social media space is ‘this industry is so saturated’. ew. if you’re too insecure and need to project onto other people, then say that. you deserve to take up space!

with that being said - do you have any specific questions regarding content creation? i’m brewing some fun and informational reads specifically for my paid tier that covers more content creation topics! i’d love to hear any questions + topic suggestions you have for future newsletters 💌